Upside Down

I tried to go back to bed after my workout. No dice. On an hour of sleep I lie upside on my studio floor, sunlight glistening and beaming, leaf shadows dancing on my face. The perfect music choice swims over me and I study the ceiling. It's a perfect rectangle. No, wait...if it were a perfect rectangle I wouldn't have noticed it. It must be different. A different, perfect rectangle. There is space for three lightbulbs up there, in the land of lightbulb fixings. I only have two. I must remember to fix this.
I wait for energy to hit my body. Currently my stomach is just an anxious knot of ick. The same knot I've had for days. I know I ought to be painting, I mean *really* painting. I hope to today. I just get so...knotted. Maybe I should spend the day doing construction instead. But oh, how I miss the paint. I will paint. But not right now. Not in the daylight. I will paint late into the night, instead. When the world is asleep and it's okay to be a knot. But not in the daylight. Not in the wake. Today is so beautiful I need to get out. I need to go here:



But there is two hours away and gas prices are ridiculous. Still...maybe I can go closer. To another rock, only an hour away. Maybe I can find the same sun, only setting, and maybe I can find another rock, only larger, and maybe I can stand up on it and scream. Scream until the tension is gone. Scream until wrong is made right.
It's feasible.
Nature.
Nature is my saviour, it always has been.
Maybe I will find a rock to bring home and polish whenever I need to breathe.
Maybe I will go on a treasure hunt.

*looks at watch*

It's only 9.39am.
Time enough still to run away.

*looks down into - appropriately green - soy milk and pond scum shake*

Yes.
Nature has always been my saviour.
I ought to get dressed and go.
Maybe even take my easel and paints.
Enough food to grill on a fire come evening.
Hit the road running and come back...cleansed.

Come on wallet...give me the funding to go....