I just talked last night on the phone to a fellow artist about my next project and about taking older stories and retelling them with a newer issue.
I said that the problem I'm having right now is that people always assume I am my work. It's why I stopped writing actually...whatever I wrote people would ask me about it. If I wrote about two girls in love people would ask if I was gay. If I wrote about drinking people would ask if I was an alcoholic. If I wrote about drugs, I was junkie.
So I'm having a little trouble with the idea of addressing specific issues because people seem to think my artwork - merely existing - is invitation to talk or ask about my life.
It's okay if you just paint a pretty picture. That's what you have and nobody assumes anything. But if you paint anything with a darker twist, people immediately ask you if you suffer from depression or a variety of other diseases.
I have great ideas/issues for the next two series of works I am concentrating on but I'm juggling with the idea of merely retelling the tales without new influence to avoid facing public speculation.
But what kind of artist can live like that?
I gave up my writing (though I do have to admit, after many years, I am writing in my mind again) due to this jumbled mess of speculation. But I will not stop my art for that.
Really, *sincerely*, being able to not care about rumours or misguided people in my life.
It means being okay with a small town thinking one particular way about me.
It means ignoring emails from family when they decide to brave up and ask ridiculous questions.
My friend, on the phone, said (rightly) that I have to go with what drives me.
And what drives me right now is the way the story fits, so well, to the issue I am addressing. And to the people that - in turn - this series may reach.
I would love for my art to be more than a pretty picture.
I would like for my pieces to start having meaning for people (like share your tears does)
So I think I'm going to run with what feels right for the art, not for me or for the general mass.
I think I'm just going to have to deal (or hide in my ivory tower and ignore) any speculation afterward.
Because surely, surely, the voice of creation is more important than the voice of speculation.